Marriage Jokes

1. Marriage Counseling

Herb and Grace are having major problems and decide to see a marriage counselor.

When the counselor asks about their sex life, Herb pitches in and says, “She doesn’t like sex!”

Grace immediately snaps back and, glaring at Herb, says, “That’s not true! I do so enjoy sex!”

Then, turning to the counselor, Grace explains: “But this animal expects it four or five times a year!”

2. Marriage Arranged by an Unborn Baby

The other day a Chinese told me that to go with the traditional custom, one’s marriage has to be decided by his or her parents and that accordingly, her mother’s marriage was arranged by her grandparents, but her sister has broken the tradition.

“How?” I asked. “Her marriage was arranged by her unborn baby.” “What do you mean?” I was puzzled.

“She had to get married because of her premarital pregnancy, “She explained in embarrassment.

3. A Family Quarrel

The young newly-weds quarreled. At last she could bear it no longer and burst into tears.

“I don’t want to have anything to do with you any more. I’m packing up my things and going off to mother.”

“Fine, my dear,” said her husband.”

Here are the traveling expenses.”

She counted the money, “What about the money for the return ticket?”